Alright, so let's set some ground rules. I think the idea of Valentine's is great! Like, I think a serious relationship should be celebrated and there should be a day of just love celebrating, and stuff. You know I think its important to celebrate that milestone. It's an American rite of passage. My only problem is that I have never been one of those people and will not be for a while. So I'd like to not be reminded of how I spend my Friday nights....alone with a tub of Greek Yogurt and my Netflix account.
Earlier today I was at the gym when I made the mistake of checking out Facebook while on my phone. I was accosted immediately by horrifying images of young love. I was devastated. There is only so much I can stand having only eaten a protein bar and a cobb salad surrounded my strange people at the gym. Of course it was a recipe for disaster. In my attempts to gain a better physique, I was attacked with the sight of two people be completely happy with each other. Sorry I don't live in an alternate universe where people love each other because they are emotionally and physically compatible and accept each other's flaws.....I LIVE IN NEW YORK CITY. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS PLACE IS LIKE?? NO ONE LOVES YOU UNLESS YOU MAKE SIX FIGURES AND WEIGH 150 LBS. WHAT KIND OF CRUELTY IS THIS!?!?!? WHY?!?!?! WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME???? HOW ON EARTH DID I ADD YOU AS MY FRIEND!?!?! :'(
Impromptu panic attack aside, I like other people's relationships like my sexuality during high school...hidden away and never spoken of. I get that you all want to proclaim your love from the tallest mountain but seriously...spare the single people in your life this February. No single person wants to be reminded of their loneliness. Leave them alone. Take that weekend to a secret beach location, but for the love of God please stay away from the instagram. Cook a romantic dinner, but if you tweet about it you're breaking more hearts than you think. And there's a special place in hell for those who pollute everyone's newsfeed with over the top and gushy status updates. KNOCK IT OFF!!
So please have an amazing Valentine's with your significant other, but leave the regulars others out of it!
So I commented on this post like a week ago, but for some reason it never saved. I would like to post again, as a follow up to that one, now that the 'holiday' is over.
ReplyDeleteWhat I said in the now-deleted comment was that the people who make a public fuss over Valentine's Day are the people who make public fusses about everything. And therefore you shouldn't be surprised when those same get in your face about either 1) how great they have it with someone and how great the holiday is, or 2) how single (and apparently, ahead of the curve) they are and how stupid the holiday is.
Well, I am writing to say that I was wrong. I didn't expect facebook to swarming with irritating Valentine's day comments, as you did. And yet, there they were. From people I never hear from and do not really care about. Posting pictures of each other and calling each other 'schmoopie'. It's sickening. You were right.